1) The biggest thing is communication. Before having the threesome ensure both your boyfriend and you have the same understanding. Talk about your boundaries, what is acceptable behavior, and the limits to the encounter. Any differences in understanding take time to work them out. Once the both of you are on the "same page" then communicate our boundaries to the invited third person and make sure they are on the "same page" with the two of you. After the threesome and as soon as possible begin to talk about the experience. Using that discussion to work through any residual issues. Also use it a way to gauge if the both of you are willing to have another threesome and if so, what changes need to be made.
2) Always remember and never forget that a threesome is about sex, nothing more. This means there should be no jealousy and no emotional involvement. If there are signs of jealousy or feelings are beginning to develop then it is important that the "threesome relationship" with the third person ends immediately.
3) All participants have the right at anytime to say "no" and to change their minds. In a threesome situation "no" means no and you should not have to repeat it.
4) Follow your boundaries and do not change them in the heat of the moment. If you are going to change your boundaries do it before meeting the third person or agree to change them during your debriefing, after the threesome. If boundaries have been intentionally or recklessly violated then the threesome should come to an end.
5) Wear clothing that you feel comfortable and sexy wearing. Remember if you are comfortable with what you are wearing you will come across confident and sexy. Ask your boyfriend and the other guy what they like to see a woman wear. Use their input as a way for you to decide what to wear.
6) Starting off the threesome is open to interpretation. Best advice I can give from experience is do not have the other guy come over and "dive into it." Instead include some "social time" where all three of you talk or do an activity together. Sometimes going out for dinner, theater, or a movie is a good ice breaker. Then from there slowly work towards transitioning to have the threesome. Things you might want to consider for transitioning include watching a porno, you undressing in front of them, encouraging one of the males to play with you and then inviting the other to join. Other things might include include playing a game of naked twister, or strip poker. In any event take some time with your boyfriend to discuss what he is comfortable with and how the two of you want to begin transitioning.
7) Avoid too much alcohol and do not use illicit drugs including cannabis. Limited alcohol, like 1 - 2 drinks, is acceptable as a social lubricant and as a part of social customs. However the problem you will run into if you use too much alcohol or illicit drugs is you will exceed your boundaries. Exceeding your boundaries will create problems for you including increasing your risk for pregnancy, STDs, HIV / AIDs, and rape. Also too much alcohol and illicit drugs may also fuel emotions that may lead to drama or violence.
8) Regarding positions that will have to be something that all three of you decide. In a threesome situation, mfm, it is not uncommon where each male has a turn penetrating the female separately. If this is the case then any position you can think of will work. In some cases positions like split roast (one male penetrating while other receives oral) or double penetration (DP) are possible. Deciding the limit of male on male interaction will have to be decided before the threesome and it will also dictate what positions are used.
9) Safe-sex must be a must. Safe-sex does not just include using a condom and a back-up contraceptive. It also means planning for your safety.
10) Remember leave as a couple.
11) Except for quick bathroom breaks make sure that your boyfriend is with at all times. This will protect you from any influencing the other male have on you and will also help to keep you safe.
12) Make sure the other male understands his role and the reason for the threesome. Many males wrongly believe that a couple has a threesome due to the fact that there is a problem with the male in the bedroom and that they have been selected due to their "special talents." It is important that the other male understands that, as a couple, you are happy and your feelings are solely for your boyfriend. The other male has been invited to enhance your sexual enjoyment and that you could have selected any number of males.
13) You are doing the right thing by going to a hotel. The one piece of advice I would give here is to make sure it is a hotel where sounds cannot be easily heard. Last thing you need is to be hearing children running down the hall, children yelling, or other people hear what is going on in your room.
14) Work out beforehand how the expenses are going to be split for the hotel. Ideally I would recommend that your boyfriend and you get a room along with the other male paying for his room. Reason for this is twofold. First if things do not work out, for whatever reason, the other male has his room. Second your boyfriend and you may not be comfortable with him staying all night with the two of you. So, it may give you some space.
15) To make special, since I do not know you personally, I can only offer some very generic advice. If your boyfriend is alright with you flirting with the other male I would recommend allow some flirting to occur. Also if your boyfriend is alright with some intimate contact (e.g. hugging, careressing, kissing, ect) with the other male happening then I would consider allowing some of it to happen between being social and transitioning to the threesome.
Another piece advice I would recommend is to build up to the sex. Let the males romance you and let you know how special you are. Simply put let them work for your attention and allow yourself to enjoy the added attention.
Thirdly, create a atmosphere that is relaxing and maybe even a bit romantic. Hotels can be a bit impersonal at times but you can do something to make it special. Maybe have both of them give you a massage together, using candles, or music in the background. Finally make the other male feel invited and welcomed.
16) If you are not comfortable with the situation then do not go through with it. However there are a few things you can try. One, as early stated, have the males give you a massage. Normally I do not recommend this but if you hare having problems getting comfortable then a suggestion would be for your boyfriend to leave for five minutes to go to the "bathroom" so that you might be comfortable with the other male. Final suggestion in regard to this maybe to have your first meeting with the other male be a meet & greet. By this I mean it is a social situation with no sex. The purpose is for everyone to get comfortable with each other without the pressure of sex lurking in the background.
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My wife and I have recently got into pegging, light bondage, and cum sharing. When she is fucking she says she wants to share another guy with me. When I try to talk afterwards, she shuts down. What do? I don't mind it, might be kinda fun.I think we can all relate to going to those really kinky places in our minds during sex where we lose our filter, letting our fantasies be verbalized. In the light of day without throbbing cocks and aching pussies we shy away from them. It’s normal…and doesn’t mean she isn’t interested in a real MMF. The reality of sharing your partner is a whole other ball game…especially for a girl. Our minds tend to analyze things to death. We aren’t as good at compartmentalizing as guys are. Sex is sex to you…if something is hot it makes sense to go after it. For girls it’s not as easy just to jump in…especially ones in long term relationships and with families. We factor everything into it and if there are enough negatives then we don’t go for it. Here are a few things that go through girl’s minds when considering a MMF:
1. Will it pose a threat to their current relationship?
2. Will they feel comfortable being intimate and naked with a new man?
3. Will their partner prefer sex with a man once they get a taste for it?
4. What if they fall for the other guy and develop feelings for him?
5. What if it’s awkward?
6. What is friends or family find out?
7. What about sexual diseases?
8. What if their guy becomes jealous and begins to resent her for fucking or enjoying another man.
9. What if she enjoys fucking the new man more?
And the list goes on and on. So the best thing to do is get her talking about her hesitations because you can bet she’s thought of it in depth. If you can work past them and maybe have her interacting with other bisexual couples where she can see how they are making it work it might help her get to a place where she is ready to take it past the fantasy stage. It’s a good sign that she herself is the one to bring it up during sex. My BBGL Forum has many couples and bisexuals who have experience and might be a good community for you both to check out. :) xoxox
Hey so I'm going to have a threesome with two guys (I'm a girl and they're roommates) on Friday and I was wondering if you had any tips for like encouraging bisexual behaviour from them? Thanks bbgl :)
Awesome news hon! Not sure how open your guys are to exploring Bisex so assuming they aren’t against it, here are a few suggestions:
1. Begin sucking a guys cock while the other is playing with you and then reaching between your legs, bring some of your girl cum up and rub it over his cock. Then look up at the other guy real sexy and ask him to have a taste. Join in if he gets shy about it.
2. Jerk them off together- get your hands all slicked up with lube and begin stroking them together. Tell them to imagine being inside your pussy like that.
3. Get one guy to feed the other one’s cock into your ass or pussy - be sure and be vocal about how hot them touching gets you.
4. Bring out the blindfold and play a game of guess who’s sucking!
5. Straddle one’s face and get the other to begin licking your ass…encourage them to really get their tongues into it.
Hope these help you get started! Would love to hear how it goes :) xoxoxo
This contribution was posted in my BBGl Forum by Washdcguy and I thought great advice!A few lessons learned from going out with MF couples.
The Ad:Write an ad geared for the woman. If a guy gets permission for a MMF or MFM then he's probably going to have to hunt for a prospective third and show his wife the ad that he's responding to. She always has veto power. So write something that he won't be embarrassed to show her. Write something that will turn her on.
Start with a photo and build a story around it. I'd suggest something titillating or flirtatious but not pornographic. Maybe a nude while sleeping on your stomach. Or sitting on the patio drinking coffee with a cup covering your privates. Or at a nude beach with a beach-ball. Leave your privates to the imagination. Enlist the help of a friend to take a few shots.
Take time writing and rewriting your ad. Even a good one might not get any responses at first. Again, remember titillating and flirtatious not pornographic or crude. Is there an animal you identify with? Maybe write something about how you are a pet seeking a loving couple.
There are a lot of guys who post ads to try a three-way that couples can respond to so be patient and re-post it a few times. Eventually you will get a few quality bites.
Arrange dinner in a public place where you can talk and get to know each other and plan to hit a dessert shop after. The restaurant should be some place that she will like the most.
Let the husband decide who sits where. For example if it's a booth he may want to sit on the same side as his wife, or he might get turned on by your sitting next to her. My vote is to sit across from her so that you can look into her eyes while you talk.
Make an effort to pay attention to her. Ask her lots of questions, get to know her and most importantly flirt with her. Remember, the woman almost always has veto power and generally women want to connect with someone they are going to sleep with. This is especially true if you want something ongoing.
Leave the couple alone at least twice during dinner. They will need to check in with each other and your absence will let them do that. Remember that protecting their relationship ought to be paramount to them and give them some space to do that.
When the check comes be prepared to pay the whole bill, this is a date after all. The husband may insist, remember it is his duty to be the provider. Politely, offer to pick up the bill three times. If he still insists then you say OK, but let me treat the two of you to dessert. You ought to have two or three different kinds of places in mind. This gives you the opportunity to contribute to the evening, to spend more time getting to know them, and to win his heart (because the way to a man's pants is through is stomach). But, vote with whatever place the woman wants to choose.
After the dessert you can walk them back to their place or their car. If you really want to see them repeatedly then it's probably a good idea not to have sex on the first date.
The husband is probably the one you've been chatting with online, so after the date write him about what a great time you had, how hot you found the two of them and how you hope to take it a step further. Let him know that you wanted to make his wife feel as comfortable as possible and that you thought he was hot too.
Repeat for the second and third date and throw in a movie, show or stand up comedy. Find excuses to hold her hand or touch her arm and to put your arm around his neck in good old buddy fashion or even give him a little shoulder squeeze/rub. Eventually the idea of a date night at home will come up.
I am in a amazing relationship with a man, we are soon to be married I want to have a mmf three some, how do I go about seeing if he would be down for this??? Thanks, and I love your page
Congrats darling! That’s hot that you want to explore some an MMF with your man. I assume by MMF you are referring to one where the guys engage in some bisex with each other? Here are a couple ways that I think are good ways to “test the waters” so to speak. For guys who are looking to approach a wife these suggestions apply to you as well….in fact they can be applied to most kinks.
How to approach a guy (or girl) about having an MMF:
1. Start A Couples Blog - the idea being you each post scenarios and fantasies you see that turn you on. It opens up dialogue easier than just blurting out you want to see your man make out with another guy. You can start with MFM scenarios so he gets use to the idea that it turns you on to see another guy in bed with the both of you and then lead into more MMF scenarios where there is some biplay.
2. Watch Porn Together - Watch some MFM porn together and feel him out on bringing another guy in the bedroom. If he is comfortable with the idea slowly introduce him to some MMF porn and see what reaction that gets you. Lots of guys once they find out it’s a kink for their wives will offer to “play” with another guy for them even if it’s not a desire on their own.
3. Bring It Up During Sex - If you aren’t into watching porn together another way to open up conversation is to bring it up during sex. When you are fucking…have him insert another dildo in your a ass and get verbal on how hot it would be if it were real. See if he gets into it. If he does you can do things like fuck your pussy with a dildo and then offer him a taste. Encourage him to suck the dildo and go crazy at how hot it makes you to see him with something cock-shaped in his mouth. Hopefully he will get the idea and it opens up some dialogue and moves you in the right direction.
4. Phone & Computer Apps - For a more direct approach plan a hot night where the theme is reveal secret kinks to each other. If you have a computer try mojoupgrade.com If you have a smart phone download an app called, Kindu (available for Android and iPhone). They're basically a series of questions about kinks and scenarios and you each answer them separately with things like yes, no, open to discussion. I recommend going down on each other while the other one answers the questions! Then you review them together and see what each others kinks are, which ones matched up and which ones didn’t. Hubby and I used it and if definitely opened up conversation in a fun way.
5. Sexual Bribery - As a last resort the old “If you do it for me, I’ll do it for you” card is sometimes a good one. Perhaps he has some hidden kink that he’s been dying to explore with you like an MFF. As a means to an end he may consider an MMF if it gets him his ultimate fantasy. Good luck with it darling :) xoxoxo
How can I tell her that I'm bi or that I like anal stuff without making her freak out?
Good question…hard to answer without knowing what your gf’s like. No easy answer here I’m afraid…you’ll have to feel her out…maybe don’t hit her with it all at once. You could slowly introduce her to some bisex threesome porn and pegging porn and point out that a lot of straight guys are into some bi-play and assplay. Sound her out on how she feels about it. Make it something that is not separate from her but that you'd maybe like to explore with her. Educate her about that sweet little p-spot in your ass that is a source of pleasure. Hopefully she is open enough to just not jump to assumptions that you must be gay because you are turned on by guys and things in your ass. Dammit…why doesn’t Hallmark make a card for these types of occasions?! xoxoxo
I love your blog it's the first thing I look at when I use tumblr. However, could I ask for some advice? I've been with my girlfriend for 5 years now and we both have high sex drives. I want to introduce her to bi mmf but don't know how to go about it? I'm not gay, I wouldn't even say I was bi but this really turns me on how can i do this without her thinking I'm gay. I was thinking of leaving my phone near her and leaving the room with some straight and bi mmf pics mixed amongst my camera roll.
Awesome…I’m so glad you enjoy it that much! First off, you are ahead of the game if she has a high sex drive. I would ask if she is open to exploring things sexually with you? I can’t recommend it enough but using Tumblr to create a couples blog where you both can post pics or video with comments like “We need to try this!”, etc is a great way to approach it. You could start off with MFM (threesome pics with two straight guys). Feel her out on just opening up the relationship. Then graduate to more MMF pics (where the men are interacting more…even just an innocent touch) and go from there. A lot of followers are finding that it opens up dialogue. You can always direct her to my blog if she has concerns that you are now suddenly gay for being curious to want to explore that type of pleasure and I’ll set her straight (no pun intended). You could leave your phone out but generally it may come across that you’ve been secretly lusting after men and hiding it from her…or that you are ashamed. Think of the couples blog as wading into the kinky pool. Tumblr has opened me up to so many things in this past year just by being exposed to images I might never have outside of it. Just a thought ;) If she has a drive, love sex and is open to new things I think you may have a good shot. However, when the dialogue unfolds about bisex, I would be proud and confident about wanting to explore it. Don’t let her think you are shamed or any DIFFERENT because of it. You’re just you…only sexier ;) xoxoxo
I had a dream the other week my partner and I were having a threesome and we sucked cock together. I've been thinking of it ever since. I told my partner about and how I might like it in reality, along with the fact our discussion gave me a hard on, and she freaked. She knows I have kinks, like having my arse pounded, but she says she doesn't want a bisexual partner. Do you think I can convince her to let me try cock sucking?
Hearing your partner is bisexual can be a shock for some people. Perhaps she just needs to digest it. It’s unrealistic to think she would smile and then jump into bed with you and another guy. First…how does she feel about two men being together? Does it disgust her? Or is she okay with it so long as you are not the one doing it? From a female’s perspective she may be worried that you will prefer men to women if you go down that road. It could be that she is not into opening up your relationship to others. It takes a secure woman and a good solid relationship to withstand the issues that may come along with introducing new partners. You may be thinking “I want cock”…she is likely thinking bigger than that. Your best bet is to keep the communication open with her and be patient. Getting her to accept that your bisexuality is part of you is the first step. Once she has calmed down and is reassured that it is not a threat to your relationship you may have a chance to explore bisex with her down the road. Good luck hon…in the meantime, keep dreaming :) xoxoxo
Hi! I love your blog. I was wondering if a woman would be more open to a threesome if it was MMF as opposed to MFF? I know it depends on the woman but I just wanted the perspective of a woman before I brought it up with her.
I guess it depends if she is into girls? In my personal opinion…yes. Jealousy can often rear it’s ugly head when another woman is intimate with our man in front of our eyes. I think it takes a very secure woman who is attracted to girls to be open to an MFF. Sure there is some jealousy when a man sees his woman be intimate with another man but you guys have some “pure sex mode” switch in your heads that I have always envied. It’s all about the pleasure of the moment so you are a little better equip to deal with the experience than a woman who may let emotions get in the way. That being said she may not be ready for an MMF which to me means both guys play together sexually. An MFM where the focus is on her seems to be what excites a lot of girls. Might be a good place to start? :) xoxoxo
Do you have any suggestions on getting my lover to get in bed with another man and him fuck me and her? Its my fantasy.. we've had a threesome but with a girl any ideas?
Well the good news is she is sexually adventurous and has experienced bisex herself. At least I am assuming the MFF had some girllove going on. You can approach it a few different ways. One - just tell her it’s been a turn on of yours for a while now and you’d like to maybe explore that with her. If she has no clue about your bi curiosity you can always ease her into it slowly. I can’t recommend it enough but using Tumblr to create a couples blog where you both can post pics or video with comments like “We need to try this!”, etc is a great way to feel her out and open up dialogue. You could start off with MFF or MFM (threesome pics with two straight guys). See how she feels about just adding another guy. Then graduate to more MMF pics (where the men are interacting more…even just an innocent touch) and go from there. If you are interested in being fucked by another man you can add in some assplay and pegging pics too so she will get the idea that you enjoy penetration. Tumblr has opened me up to so many things in the past two years just by being exposed to images I might never have outside of it. It may be good for her to see what else is out there that turns her crank. Just a thought ;) If she has a drive, love sex and is open to new things I think you may have a decent shot. Good luck! xoxoxo